Embracing Menopause:
A Transpersonal Approach
By
Anonymous Student, Atlantic University
Part 1:
New Thought:
A Mind/Body Perspective on the Menopausal Transition
The "New Thought" movement has two fundamental beliefs- the first being that the "Divine is in all things" and the second, that the "mind is much more real and powerful than matter" (Lumen, para 2). While this movement is one that is spiritually based, it does not subscribe to any one particular creed but instead to the simple recognition of the spirit that dwells in all of us and the power that spirit has to heal both the body and the mind. Originating in the nineteenth century, the "New Thought" movement is often seen as an "east meets west" sort of philosophy where many of the integrative teachings of ancient Indian and Chinese practices are being assimilated into western thought. Many, but not all of its churches are based in Christianity and include faiths such as the Unity Church, the Church of Religious Science and the Church of Divine Science. It is interesting to note that where science and religion have oftentimes been at odds, scientists and theologians working to negate each other's beliefs, the "New Thought" movement takes the opposite stance and works toward combining the basis of these two truth-seeking disciplines. When one considers, without bias, the premise that is behind both science and religion, it is easy see that they are truly interwoven, ultimately serving not to contradict but to support each other- the discoveries made by science only confirming our belief in the Divine and our belief in the Divine leading us to probe ever deeper into sciences that will help us to better understand her complex nature.
Although the "New Thought" movement has many founders such as Ernest Holmes, Phineas Quimby and Mary Eddy, it is Emma Curtis Hopkins who is believed to be one of the most influential in the development of the movement's ideas. In fact, Emma Hopkins' influence was so pervasive that she became known within the "New Thought" movement as the "Teacher of Teachers" (Lumen, para 6), inspiring many of the movements other founders such as Ernest Holmes who not only studied individually with Emma Hopkins, but also believed her to be a "genuine mystic". Drawing upon the Bible and many non- Christian scriptures as well as the works of various philosophers and saints, much of Emma Hopkins' teachings include her view of the "Christian Trinity as three aspects of divinity, each playing a role in different epochs in history: God the Father, God the Son and God the Mother-Spirit". She also viewed the changing roles of women as the "beginning of a new epoch- the reign of the Mother aspect of God" (Religious Facts, 2007, para 6).
As we continue to move more deeply into the twenty-first century and begin the long, arduous task of cleaning yet another oil spill from an all ready fragile ecosystem, one cannot help but realize that there is, indeed a growing urgency for the recognition of this "Mother aspect of God", for an embracing of the divine feminine that has struggled to sustain us for millennia in the form of Mother Earth. And, as with all mothers, as with all women who live long enough, Mother Earth will invariably come to the time of her menopause, to a "change of life" which, by necessity will demand a change in the lives of all who depend on her for survival as well, a change that she may be beginning to undergo at this very moment.
As a nearly post-menopausal woman who experienced a quite lengthy "menopause from hell", I can truly attest to the power of the mind in its ability to wreck havoc within the body. Hot flashes, cold flashes, severe anxiety, panic attacks, trembling, a racing pulse, sky-rocketing blood pressure and not-even-a-wink-of-sleep insomnia ... all of this and more can be experienced during a severe menopausal crisis. But what, you may ask, is the cause of all of this mayhem? Is it all in a woman's mind? Bingo! All of this chaos and mayhem is the result of what a woman has been holding in her mind, in her body and in her spirit. For women without such "baggage", this "change of life" is a breeze, one or two hot-flashes and they are on their way, ready for their "second half" of life to begin. For other women who may have experienced episodes of trauma during their lives, trauma whose related emotions and energy have not been processed but have been stored within the mind/body/spirit, this "change of life" may bring about any number of physical and/or emotional challenges which, in order to heal will require an inner exploration that, for some will be their life's greatest challenge. According to Dr. Christine Northrup in her book, The Wisdom of Menopause, "We attract precisely the illness or problem that best facilitates our access to our inner wisdom ... though this is true throughout our lives, it hits us harder and more directly during perimenopause and menopause ... The wisdom of this system is very precise" (2001, p.19); in other words, each menopausal woman will be faced with whatever challenge will most draw her attention inward so that she might begin to "mother" herself and tend to her own long-awaited healing. Taking into consideration the precepts of the "New Thought" movement- that the mind has the power to heal the body- it is to the mind/body/spirit and the connection between these essences of being that a woman will need to turn in order to heal the many challenges presented to her during her transition and, among the most powerful tools she can use to access these inner realms is self-hypnosis.
When deciding to embark on a menopausal self-hypnosis program, a woman has several types of self-hypnosis she might choose to explore, the most common being the directive type, where for example, suggestions for coolness are given when a woman is experiencing a hot-flash. For most of us, this is the most popular form of hypnosis, where suggestions are offered as a means of telling the subconscious what to do: to keep the body cool, to quit smoking, to eat less, to not be afraid of snakes or, as in the case of stage hypnosis, to cluck like a chicken- and while this type of hypnosis certainly does have its place, it is through the more spiritual types of self-hypnosis that an inner dialogue with the subconscious can be created, an ongoing dialogue that can help a woman to better understand what is causing her challenges and how to best negotiate a resolution for them. In this way, she is not simply putting a band-aid on a problem that may require far deeper healing; she is allowing the subconscious to "speak for herself" in her desire, or, more accurately, in her demand for healing. When dealing with an overloaded energy system as is often the case during a difficult menopause, if the challenge presented is urgent enough, attempting to "put a cap" on the pressure will only cause that challenge to manifest in some other way in some other part of the body; what needs to be released will be released in one way or another. This can be seen in many areas of life but it is especially true when one is dealing with the energies of the feminine- whether in her monthly cycles, in childbirth or even in lactation, a woman's very essence is about the releasing of powerful life energies.
When considering which applications of spiritual self-hypnosis would most benefit a woman during a menopausal crisis, there is no need to choose- each one of its many applications have the potential of offering a woman some access to her inner world. A good place to start is with an exploration in which a woman can meet with a "spiritual guide". This guide can take any form- a person, an animal, a plant or even an element of nature such as the wind- and can then accompany a woman on the many journeys she will have to take in order to find her way to her new and emerging self. For many women, this will require that she first find her way back to the self she left behind before her life traumas overtook her, a self that lies buried beneath layer upon layer of unprocessed anger, grief and fear- a task that will be made much easier with the help of an inner "spiritual guide". There have been many times during my own menopausal crisis that I have used a self-hypnotic exploration in order to connect with some of my "spiritual guides". At times, I met with personalities from my Dissociative Identity Disorder, child alters who helped me to remember events from my past. At other times, I met with various elder women from indigenous tribes, each of them offering some type of comfort or wisdom for my continued journey. I've even met with some of the vultures from a nearby cemetery as they relayed to me their own wisdom about characteristics I should have in order to live the best life possible. Even now, I am able to journey to the places where I've encountered these "spiritual guides" and again and again, benefit from their wise counsel.
Another application of spiritual hypnosis that I've used several times during my menopausal crisis is past-life exploration. For this, a woman uses the trance state as a way of accessing material from a "previous life" with the intention of gaining additional knowledge about herself, not only about her current struggles but about her talents and successes as well. When attempting to undergo a past-life exploration, it is essential to keep in mind that whether or not these past- life experiences are "real" is irrelevant; even if the images offered are indeed products of the explorer's imagination, these images come with the intention to heal, each one of them having the potential of helping to release long-held energies and emotions from the psyche. One can think of these images much like the symbols that are presented to us in dreams, each one embedded with a wealth of information about the workings of our inner world. Through her past- life experiences, a woman may also discover elements of karma that are affecting her present life relationships. This information may help her to more easily navigate whatever interpersonal difficulties she may be having as well as to better understand the complexities within her relationships.
Another application of self-hypnosis that can be of great benefit during a woman's menopausal transition is the enhancement of her creative impulses. Whether through dreams, journaling, artistic pursuits such as writing or painting or even renewed sexual impulses, much like the premenstrual phase of a woman's menstrual cycle, perimenopause is often a time of intense creative impulses that, with the help of self-hypnosis, can be channeled into areas that offer profound healing. In fact, it was during my own menopausal crisis that I was able to write several volumes of poetry, many of the lines and stanzas pouring out of me fully formed before even reaching the page. As my ability to enter trance during this time was also enhanced, I didn't even require any formal induction in order to spontaneously create these works. Actually, looking back, I feel that my entire "crisis state" was a state of trance that I needed only to turn my attention to in order to reap its benefits in my healing.
Whether a woman decides to use a prewritten script for these applications of spiritual self-hypnosis or to create her own, there is much she can learn about herself through the inner explorations presented here as well as through numerous others. Our inner universe is as vast and expansive as the one that lies outside our physical selves and has within it just as many mysteries still waiting to be discovered. During a menopausal crisis, it becomes vital that a woman begin to explore her inner mysteries, to learn to honor those mysteries and use them to create healing and wholeness in her life.
Currently, there are approximately fifty million women in menopause, fifty million and one if Mother Earth is indeed experiencing her "change" at this time as well. As this number continues to grow and more and more women enter this place of "elder-wisdom", perhaps the new epoch envisioned by Emma Curtis Hopkins will begin to emerge- the epoch of the divine feminine, of a renewed reverence for "God the Mother Spirit" and for the essence of her spirit that lives within each one of us and within every inch of Mother Earth as well. As we look to all the uncertainty that lies ahead, both in the Gulf and within our own lives, it is important to remember that, as is the case with a woman's menopause, change isn't always easy but it is always inevitable.
References
Lumen, C. (Accessed 7/21/10). New thought. The center for spiritual living. Retrieved from
http://www.newthoughtcs.org/history
New thought movement. (2007, February 9). Religious facts. Retrieved from
http://www.religiousfacts.com/a-z-religion-index/new.thought.htm
Northrup, C. (2001) The wisdom of menopause, Creating physical and emotional health and
healing during the change. New York: Bantam.
Part 2:
Movement for Menopause-
Awakening the Goddess at Midlife
As I find myself nearing the end of my first semester in graduate school, I can't help but take notice of an interesting coincidence- I am also nearing the end of the single most difficult transformative period of my life- my menopausal transition. While this may be a relatively easy "change of life" for many women, for those of us struggling with the aftereffects of childhood abuse and trauma, this can be an extremely difficult time fraught with physical, emotional and spiritual challenges. In addition, this month also marks the five year anniversary of the exploding of my Kundalini crisis- an event so soul-shattering that, during late October of 2005, I entered a psychiatric hospital. As I reflect on the coinciding of these events and anniversaries, I can see that their overlapping at this point in my life is actually in no way a coincidence. It is an intentional crossroad where my efforts to remember and release the events of my past are beginning to ease, insisting that I begin to turn my attention to the demands of the present and to the possibility of what lies ahead. I suppose that these are crossroads we all find ourselves standing at many times during our lives, where the roads of past, present and future intersect and beckon us onward, only, for me, awash in the integration of my dissociated identities, I suddenly find myself with a past I never knew existed- my repressed memories of abuse and rape now tightly woven into the fabric of my life. It's a difficult place to start from; so much of what I once held as truth- family, relationships, what I had construed as love- having been replaced by something much, much different. I have to ask myself: Who is this woman looking back at me from the mirror now? Same eyes and smile but hair streaked with white and face with lines of wisdom- Who is this woman? As I continue my journey to try and answer this question, I am grateful to have this course to invite me to stop and look more deeply into the reflection ... and to help me try to more concretely define the "Movement for Menopause" idea that first came to me during the early days of my crisis. Even with my mind so jumbled that it was difficult to pack my sons' lunch, something told me it would be a practice related to my body that would ultimately heal both my mind and my soul.
In order to formulate a practice for my "Movement for Menopause" idea, one that would encompass many of the aspects of my own transformative and meditative practices, I decided to combine some of my most treasured healing tools- movement, music, meditation, breath and voice. For me, meditation has rarely been something I could engage in while sitting still. I have always felt much more in touch with Spirit when my muscles have been pumping it through my body, my mind free to wander over whatever terrain it chooses. A daily yoga devotee who usually practices in silence, I've also discovered how much music has the capacity to change my experience and how much my experience changes depending on the music. With two twenty-year old sons in the house, there are many days when, in the middle of my yoga practice, I suddenly find myself surrounded by music, songs ranging anywhere from the haunting moans of Lisa Gerrard to the frantic wails of "Rage Against the Machine", each adding a new and transformative dimension to my daily meditation. On a side note, I also find it interesting how my sons seem to know exactly where my energies are on any particular day and where they need to go- how much I cherish being a few postures into my practice when all of a sudden, the Native American flutes of our A Thousand Roads CD start to echo across my room. Instantly, I'm transported to another time, another place, perhaps even to another life time when I danced to similar songs. But I digress ... for this "Movement for Menopause" project, I decided it would be best to choose my own music ahead of time and ask my sons to leave the "Rage Against the Machine" tunes for another day. What I decided to experiment with is flute music recorded by my former therapist, music that several months ago gave me a psychic vision into a difficult experience he'd had as a child.
The other aspect of my project, adding breath and voice to my movement, music and meditation, is a practice I began while taking Continuum Movement classes. Continuum is a movement/sound practice developed by former dancer, Emile Conrad, to help her heal during her own transformative crisis. Here, the practitioner makes various vocal sounds such as "O", "E", and "Em" and directs them to different parts of the body- from the navel down each of the legs or from the back of the neck to the sacrum. Various layers of sound are added in succession, the "exploration" culminating with an unstructured movement sequence where each person follows his/her own inner guidance into a fluid "dance" piece. Considering what scientists have learned regarding sound and healing, especially with the "drone" where a certain note is held for a long period of time and is able to break up even solid masses such as kidney stones, I was especially intrigued by this practice and found it to be immensely healing, allowing me to break up various energy blocks throughout my body. In order to adapt this vocal practice to fit my vision for my "Movement for Menopause" project, I decided that I would add various sounds to some of my yin yoga postures, yin yoga being a practice that focuses on longer held postures performed meditatively while seated or lying down on the mat. As in Continuum, my intention here was to have the postures, along with the vocal sounds and their intended direction, help to clear some of my old energy blocks and eventually, lead to open movement. As I mentioned earlier, this is quite different from my usual yoga practice which, for years, has consisted of traditional yoga postures performed in silence.
Considering that I usually end my yoga sessions with a brief meditation while in Svasana (Corpse Pose), I thought it might be interesting to add yet another dimension to this exploration and use a Creative Process self-hypnosis tape as part of my final meditation. For this, I chose to use a pre-written script titled, "Enhancing Creativity" which I found in Henry Bolduc's book, Self-Hypnosis, Creating Your Own Destiny. By adding the self-hypnosis tape, I could extend the creative process of the movement piece into the meditation and see what happens. Also, as a writer, in order to best process my experiences, I decided to keep a daily journal of my thoughts regarding my explorations.
Finally, with the entire project mapped out, I was ready to begin. I have to admit, I didn't expect much when I began this journey. After all, I have been doing yoga every day for years. Why would these few changes make any difference? Boy, was I ever wrong! Here's a little bit of what I discovered ...
The first day of my "Movement for Menopause" exploration, I didn't think there would be any free movement. I had already performed several postures and various sounds and still, nothing was happening. I suppose I was so used to my daily routine, or should I say, so "stuck in a rut" that even with the notes of the flute music high above me, I remained grounded. Then, when I got to Swan Posture everything began to change, to open up, my body finally feeling safe enough to let go of the confines of the postures so that I could begin to explore the places in between. Perhaps it was the posture itself- Swan Posture- that inspired my willingness to take flight- the many times I'd seen the swans at a local lake suddenly let go of the water and begin to soar, the sound of their wings whirring in their wake. Whatever it was, suddenly I was soaring as well, every now and then coming back down to earth to find my way into another yoga posture- Child's Pose, Bow Pose, Bridge Posture. I think the important element in this type of work is to get to a place where the combination of the sound, music and breath is able to establish enough of a trance where the subconscious mind can take over and direct the free movement. Unlike the yoga postures which are consciously derived, the free movement must be inspired by the deeper processes of the subconscious mind.
Once I completed all of the postures I had mapped out for the "landing" portions of my exploration, I moved into Svasana and began my Creative Process self-hypnosis tape, the flute music still soaring above me. As expected, I was able to enter a much deeper state of trance than usual, having been engaged in a "moving meditation" state for nearly an hour before beginning the tape. While I didn't experience any urge to get up and begin a new creative endeavor during the tape such as writing poetry, I feel this is because the "Movement for Menopause" exploration is the poetry- it is the creative process. Nothing else is necessary when the creativity is woven within the experience itself, woven into the movement. The movement itself is the gift.
As I mentioned earlier, my ultimate hope through this "Movement for Menopause" project was to be able to release any energy blocks still held in my body. Oftentimes, this would happen during Continuum ; I would cry, remember some episode of abuse or have some other type of release. Although nothing like this happened during my initial "Movement for Menopause" exploration, what happened a few hours afterward was quite powerful. I was dusting, concentrating on getting my house clean when I noticed all sorts of pains beginning to crop up throughout my body. While at 51 years old, I am used to the occasional back ache, this was different; it was much deeper and much more extensive. I was about to go outside to mow the lawn, started to feel exceptionally tired and decided to lie down for a few minutes. Within seconds of my head hitting the pillow, I started to cry- deep, wrenching sobs that seemed to come from every cell of my body and that seemed to be related to a dream I'd had that night. Although I had written the dream down earlier in the day, apparently I still needed to work with its energy and emotions, the exploration helping to remove whatever blocks I had created in order to avoid dealing with the situation presented by the dream. As painful as confronting the situation was, I was relieved to have been able to move the energy and as a result, had a wonderful time working outside in my gardens.
Each day, upon finishing my "Movement for Menopause" exploration, I set aside some time to chronicle my experiences in a journal. Here is a sample entry from that journal:
The movement began even earlier today. It's as if I've been letting go of this ancient yoga practice which has, for so long, contained me. So rigid- so yang in its directed postures, postures defined for me by someone else centuries ago. It doesn't even seem to make sense anymore, not at this time, within this moment, not within what is necessary for me now. Needing to move into my own energy in life REQUIRES that I move into my own energy in my practice- my mind/body/spirit practice. "Looking for Lynda" requires
that I let go of all that has held me captive within the old order of things, to all that I allowed to define and limit me for so long. Looking for the limitlessness within ... I must learn to let go of the container and live. This reminds me of a dream I once had- I was at my old high school. There was a rabbit in some sort of CONTAINMENT SYSTEM. Finally, she was able to break free. Isn't that what we all struggle to do? To break free of all that limits and contains us?
I'm still using the yoga postures as a starting place- a check point- a place to land in between my "flights of fancy". It's an interesting dynamic- the posture and then the pulse that carries me out of its structure and form, out of its rigidity into formlessness and grace- the music of the flute adding buoyancy to the dance- the weightlessness between the notes- suspension where the next movement builds and builds, crescendo-ing into itself ... an amazing journey that calls me to a place deep within myself where I have discovered the sky.
Although I didn't expect much when I began this "Movement for Menopause" project, I am certainly astounded by what these explorations have been teaching me, not only about my mind/body/spirit but also about some of the changes I need to make in my practice and in my life. I am standing at a crossroads, one that is asking me to let go of the outdated ways in which I have defined myself, body disciplines that I used as a way to try and control the storms that raged within me and the truths that threatened to destroy me. I have worked hard these past five years to remember and release much of the trauma that had kept my psyche frozen in the past; it's amazing how events I couldn't even remember had been controlling so much of my life for so long. Today, I am finally free from most of the chaos and the fear and while it may still take some time for me to realize that it is safe for me to move, to soar, to take to the sky, at least I can believe that maybe, just maybe, I now have the wings to try.